Ha! I win this round.

Below you'll find the thinly veiled vitriol of my letter to my (21-year-old) landlord's mom requesting a discount in rent due to all the unmitigated (is it ever mitigated?) bullshit I've been through as their tenant. And guess what? Though her response was slightly accusatory on several points (none of which I found to be the least bit valid, like the fact she'd "heard" when my lease was up at the other place I'd been looking at other places to live.. um.. isn't that what people usually do when their lease is up?), yet overall I think she was forced to recognize me as a fellow adult and not some Natty Lite swigging, unemployed college student. Hooray for me. Enjoy.

Mrs. Always Slightly Bitchy,

I'm writing you to discuss my request for a discount on rent for this month.

To begin with, I have been an exemplary tenant since I first moved into the downtown residence in December of 2004. I have always paid my rent on time, kept my space clean, and have always taken responsibility in matters concerning myself and my roommates.

I'm sure by now you are well aware of the specifications of my job, meaning that I'm rarely home. This makes me a preferable roommate in that although I'm frequently not at home, I still pay for rent and utilities as a full-time resident.

I believe myself to be a fairly easygoing person who does not complain without significant cause. At the downtown residence, two roommates moved in and shared what had formerly been "my" bathroom, and I was given less than a week's notice that my situation would be changing. Also, despite the fact that I was now sharing living space with two additional people, my rent and utilities did not decrease. A similar situation occurred when your son began occupying that fourth bedroom. It was never communicated to me that there would be another roommate, nor did my financial responsibility ever decrease.

The reason I deserve a discount on this month's rent is that I incurred expenses due to unresolved issues in the James Island home. These are as follows:

$25.70 - This is the amount I spent on one month's phone service (March 21 - April 23) that did not work due to technical problems with the jack/phone line.

$12.95 - This is the amount I paid for my TiVo subscription for one month which also did not work as it depends on an active phone line.

$15.00 - Because the mail service had not been adequately set up until I contacted the post office, I did not receive several pieces of mail on time including my vehicle tags, which I then had to go to the tax office and DMV to obtain, at this cost, to avoid driving with expired tags.
$8.00 - This is the amount of money I spent on laundry services, as I'd believed I would have access to a working washer/dryer in the James Island residence but did not for the first three weeks.


The total cost of these items is $66.65. This does not include the amount spent on gasoline driving to the DMV, tax office, or to James Island from downtown almost every day during the 2 1/2 weeks that my belongings were at the James Island residence while I was still sleeping on a mattress on the floor of the downtown home.

With all due respect, I would like to remind you that I am a tenant of this property and as such expect a certain standard of living; namely that utilities be in working order. A fair discount is $100. Were I living anywhere else there would be no question as to whether this amount should be deducted from the rent in addition to these problems being fixed.

I chose to broach this subject with you because I consider your daughter a friend and don't wish to cause discord in the household. Also, from what she's told me, she's not in a position financially to provide me with this discount.

I appreciate your attention to this matter and I will await a response so that I know what amount my rent check should be.

Sincerely,
Me