Cheap jewelry ın Turkey!

Barterıng ın foreıgn countrıes ıs fun... after spendıng so much tıme ın Europe lately where the dollar ıs basıcally worthless, ıt's nıce to see ıt gets a lıttle respect ın some places. I just bought my mom a sılver cartouche wıth her name engraved ın hıeroglyphıcs for ten bucks and a couple amulet necklaces for myself for three apıece. Tomorrow, I thınk I mıght get a manıcure and pedıcure (ıf condıtıons look sanıtary) for three dollars each. Cheap = fun for Devashan!

And now.. fun in London!

On a lighter note, fun things I did/saw/whatever in London:

• witnessed the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace (though I had to tackle a wall of Japanese tourists to see)
• lit candles at Westminster Abbey
• browsed antique shops on Portobello Road (in Notting Hill)
• posed with lots of wax celebrities for pictures at Madame Tussaud's
• traversed both the London Bridge and the Tower Bridge
• of COURSE, saw Big Ben
• rode on a double-decker bus
• employed expressions such as "couldn't be bothered" and "wanker"
• all in all, walked about ten miles in flip flops.. my calves are still recovering!

Okay, so that was all a lie.

I haven't been in Asia at all!!

I didn't mean to deceive you, people. I just entered the twilight zone of no (free) internet access (cause I'm cheap) and couldn't let you know.

I actually flew into Manston, England, which is a couple hours south of central London. We stayed in Canterbury for FIVE NIGHTS, incidentally, the longest layover I've ever had, anywhere.

(I just want to interject that as I type this, I'm on hold with Crew Scheduling and listening to a never-ending instrumental rendition of "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?")

Anyway, those of you paying attention to the recent news in London might wonder how my travel experience fit into all that...

Well, I did spend a day in London, which was the day after the second bombings. On the streets, I couldn't discern a noticeable atmosphere of fear, except for the fact that they may have been much more crowded with tourists otherwise. However, I have a confession to make.. The price of my train ticket from Canterbury included free access to the tube (that's the subway for you Yanks) so I was all over that damn thing. Sorry, Mom. But I'm okay!!

The tube was practically deserted until later in the afternoon, when they closed almost all of the lines due to a police shooting. The bobbies (who typically do not carry guns) chased a man they believed was a terrorist bomber onto one of the tube cars, held him to the ground, and shot him five times in the head.

I picked up a copy of the paper on my way home, in which bystanders described the man as "Pakistani".. Noticeably absent, however, was any info proving or disproving whether Scotland Yard had gotten the right man. I found out the next day, he was just some Brazilian guy.

Think about this: I braved the tube all day that day, worrying only about potential terrorist action. Not wanting to, but looking at Muslim-appearing passengers with suspicion. But what if I looked Middle Eastern? Then I'd have a whole new concern - my palms would sweat if I saw the police, they'd stare me down.. and if for some strange reason I bolted from them, they'd shoot me.

I don't blame the London police for their response to the horrors of these recent attacks. I just reel when I consider the far-flung implications of what is going on today.

Into the Orient

Finally! Something to do!

I'm leaving Sunday morning for Korea, which, by the way, the dumbass Weather Channel website completely denies the existence of... and I know it sounded funny just now to end that sentence with a preposition but it was an awkward thing to say.

I've been lolling around either in bed, at the beach, or in a bar for the past two weeks. Sounds just lovely until the existential angst sets in.

Osan, which many military folk know well, is basically an Asian Tiajuana. There's this bar there called the Chicken Head (I don't even want to know) which is (supposedly) banned for any military personnel stationed there, and consequently, my company followed suit and told us we aren't supposed to hang out there.

It seems most edicts issued by HQ are ignored, lost in the jungle of bureaucratic B.S. And undoubtedly our people still go to this Chicken Head.

But anyway, I've never been so this information is second-hand. Apparently the big drawing point of the place is its affinity for strange new gadgets, electrical and otherwise, which would be ridiculously legal to give to drunk people in the U.S. I guess if you enjoy being knocked to the ground by repeated electrical shocks for fun, this would be your place. Or if you really enjoy beer helmets, beer bongs, and other apparatus with which to chug. The whole thing is pretty sophomoric, but I've heard a number of pilots old enough to be my dad gleefully expound on the pleasures of Chicken Head.

Well, who knows. I'm adventuresome. Maybe I'll check the place out..

Why are vets so expensive?

I took Mojo, a.k.a. my little man, a.k.a. Boodle, a.k.a. Boo-bear a.k.a. Mr. Handsome.... umm, this could go on for awhile - my cat, that is, to the vet today for vaccinations and stuff. Everything went fine and all but you know what?

Those bastards really robbed me blind. I felt violated as I wrote the check! Not that I mind forking over some cash for the sake of sweet, innocent Mojo's health, but now I can barely afford to buy him food.

Seriously. Why can't my health insurance partially cover my pet? Oh that's right; it barely covers me!! Arrghh!!! Boo and I, we're moving to Canada!!

Oh and get this. They charged me $9.75 to CLIP HIS NAILS. Almost ten bucks. No shit!! I thought they did it as a courtesy, so I asked them to do it. There was absolutely nothing said about there being a charge involved, I mean, it seriously takes less than two minutes to do.

Assholes!!

Okay, I feel better now. Just pet the kitty and calm down.

Mmm. Fat.

I love pasta. Absolutely, constantly, mouth-wateringly, cannot-be-stopped-by-a-speeding-train crave a regular influx of pasta. Rigatoni, spaghetti, fusilini, ravioli, penne rigate, linguini, rotini, bow-tie, tortellini, macaroni... And there are so many ways to prepare it! With veggies, meat, cream sauce, cheese, garlic - just about anything, really. A person could fashion an everchanging, life-long diet with pasta as the main staple.

BUT(you knew it was coming)... Lately, I've been trying to watch what I eat. One's metabolism tends to run out of steam as one approaches his/her mid-twenties, I've discovered. At least, I suppose, I can fondly recall years past during which I consumed incredibly unhealthy combinations and amount of what can only be described as junk with no thought of tomorrow's flab.

But it's okay, because Lean Cuisine actually makes really ( I mean relatively) good pastas. I'm not being paid to say this - I just ate some three-cheese stuffed ravioli with peppers and tomato sauce. Unfortunately, I probably drastically compromise the nutritional boons of such a meal by covering it with grated parmesan cheese which, by the way, I cannot live without. Anyway, just thought I'd pass this info along in case there's anyone out there cruelly denying themselves of one of life's greatest pleasures. We wouldn't want that.

Bridge Burgers are people!!!

Yesterday afternoon I walked across the new Cooper River bridge, which will open for traffic July 16th and hold the record for the longest cable stay bridge in North America. I think it's a little bewildering for Charlestonians, as we still love our original, rickety two bridges connecting Mount Pleasant to the peninsula - the Grace and Pearman bridges, henceforth to be known as the "old old" Cooper River bridge and the "old new" Cooper River bridge, respectively.

Anyway, my friend - we'll just refer to him as "Blarg" from now on - and I, we had brunch at A.C.'s on King Street, as they actually serve brunch until 4 - and then tackled the approximately four-mile span of the thing.

The atmosphere on the bridge fairly crackled with historical significance. Bountiful indeed were the babies in strollers, who I imagine were included either:
a) to provide more resistance/exercise to their pushers
b) so that a hundred years from now, when this bridge needs to be replaced, these kids can write heart-wrenching editorials to the Post & Courier about having seen its inception
c) to annoy everyone else and keep them from behaving like the degenerates we are (haha, just
kidding)

So as Blarg and I were nearing the first arch, we noticed that the crowd was the thickest at the apex, and (naturally) began speculating about whether there was some sort of giant meat grinder they were all being pushed into just beyond our view, and imagining Bridge Burger stands on the other end and.. you get the drift... Bridge Burgers are people!!!

Hey, that'd be one way to cut down on the upcoming insane traffic when the bridge actually opens...

First the shark attacks, now this.

God does not want me to go to Florida.

Somehow my innocent summer plans have clashed miserably with His. I was supposed to drive down to Destin yesterday to visit my dad, but now they're calling for a mandatory evacuation, courtesy of Hurricane Dennis.

Sucks, cause now it's about to storm here in Charleston.

A young Tatum O'Neal, and, some say, a dead ringer for me. Though I'd like to add that I don't think I look like I'm 11... And that's a handsome eyebrow arch.  

Delayed Empathy Woman!

"I feel really bad about yesterday..."

I've figured something out. Ever wonder who you'd be if you were a superhero? I know who I'd be... because I am.. Delayed Empathy Woman!! Here to belatedly suffer your woes with you (like tomorrow, maybe)! Here to remember that something was bothering you back in '87! Heck, I'll even ditch you for an evening just so I can wake up and feel your pain tomorrow!!

dah dah dahdaaaahhhhhhh! DEW!

get out of my house!

Out, damn houseguests!

I'm saying it here so I don't have to say it out loud.

I came home from my last trip to find two approximately 20-year-old boys sleeping on the couches in the living room, courtesy of the two 20-year-old girls who are living here for the summer.

One of my year-round roomies says they were supposed to spend one night, and that night was actually the fourth. Last night I thought they'd left b/c they weren't sleeping on the couch. But they were HERE when I woke up and they're just milling around the house now. Apparently they slept on the beach last night and one of them had an insanely boring story about a couple skinny-dipping near them to tell me while I was scrambling eggs for myself this morning.

Interesting how apparently the girls said, "You can't sleep here anymore.. but you can hang out at the house all day while we're at work." That to me, still sort of consitutes staying here. Maybe that's just me, huh?

Killkillkill.Themthemthem.

countries I've visited

Lots of people ask me how many countries I've visited, etc.

In no particular order:

1. U.S. (duh)
2. Germany
3. England
4. Luxembourg
5. Belgium
6. France
7. the Netherlands
8. Switzerland
9. Scotland
10. Ireland
11. Italy
12. the Bahamas
13. Japan
14. Korea
15. Canada
16. Australia
17. Kuwait
18. Bahrain
19. Turkey

The only one in which I never actually saw anything beyond the airport is Canada, and the ones I've lived in include the U.S., Germany, France, and Japan.

guilty-blogger syndrome

I swear my silence of late is not entirely my fault.. Most of the places I stayed during this trip either did not have internet access, or wanted to charge exhorbitant rates for usage. I went to Bahrain and the hotel wanted to charge like $40/day! Yikes, right?

I've been home since the night of the second but I've been battling jet-lagged induced laziness ever since. I haven't even done any laundry yet!

I think before I had this job, I thought of jet lag as something simple and easily solved by extra rest, but I'm here to say now that I underestimated its various and complicated effects. Circadian rhythms are, pardon my French, not to be fucked with. When they are, other bodily systems rebel in misguided sympathy, for example, one's immunity tends to stop working and instead curls up into a fetal position and starts rocking. Stupid immunity! What do I pay you for anyway?

I was (pitifully) excited last night because I was tired at around midnight, and I (foolishly) hoped I might get a normal 8 (to 10) hours sleep and thus right my sleeping patterns. Oh no, after a two-hour nap, I spent the next five hours lolling around in bed until I finally got aggravated into taking a sleeping pill. Then I got up at 3 p.m. Son of a bitch.